Broken Fanaticism

Lately, the various news reports on the television had been creeping closer and closer to her daily life, giving her the feeling that the world was slowly shrinking. First came the warnings for various disasters, followed by public protests triggered by insurance companies canceling policies. Even several politicians she had previously only heard of began delivering speeches in the park where she usually went for walks.

Ever since she had discovered the stray cat’s carcass in the overgrown grass that day, she hadn't returned there. However, what left an impression on her was that the cat seemed to have been well-cared for while it was alive; she just didn't know by whom.

As she thought about this, her pencil unconsciously sketched an outline on the white paper. It was a figure seen from behind. Even without color or much detail, Clo knew exactly whose silhouette she had drawn.

It was as if there were a special fate between them. From the first time she had met Li Yue, she’d felt an extremely unique sensation. Despite it being their first meeting, there was an incredible sense of familiarity, as if the girl were the daughter of some acquaintance in her memories—and yet, she wasn't.

She couldn't exactly say that a connection from a past life had been renewed in the present. She shook her head with a touch of self-deprecation; she had always considered herself an atheist. How could such strange thoughts suddenly flood her mind?

Still, it had indeed been a while since she’d seen Li Yue. Though her emotions were somewhat complicated, if she peeled them back and looked closely, at the very core was a lingering sense of longing.

It was three days after their last encounter when Clo saw Li Yue again. It was during a quiet lunch break that Clo had long since grown accustomed to. The tranquil girl sat down beside her like a ghost. Her complexion didn't look good—she was pale and seemed somewhat dazed and spiritless.

“Good afternoon?” Clo greeted her tentatively.

“Mm, good afternoon,” Li Yue responded with a soft nod. She pulled her schedule out from the slot in her desk. She seemed to be in a trance for a moment, suffering from the illusion of not knowing what year or day it was, momentarily unsure which textbooks to prepare for the afternoon classes.

She spread several books out on the table. It seemed she had forgotten the textbook for one of her courses, which added a few more layers of frustration to her already poor complexion.

Li Yue was a meticulous and cautious person. This wasn't like her.

Clo looked at the light makeup around the girl's eyes. The hurried application couldn't hide the dark circles, much less the exhaustion in her gaze. Her attention wasn't on Clo; instead, she kept flipping through the textbook in her hand with an air of preoccupation, appearing deep in thought yet somehow lost.

“What’s wrong?” Clo asked casually. She adjusted her posture from her midday nap; a mysterious sense of pressure made it impossible for her to stay slumped over her desk.

“I’ve had nightmares for a few days, so I haven't been sleeping well. Maybe it's because I changed my blanket; it’s not comfortable to sleep under,” Li Yue answered dismissively. She glanced at the classmates she occasionally associated with. Sensing the negative emotions in her eyes, they reconsidered and decided not to come over to say hello.

Clo observed Li Yue quietly. she felt that something in the other girl's eyes had changed. She felt a faint sense of unease, unsure why she could sense such a contradictory and alien emotion emanating from her.

There was a sense of broken conviction, like shattered glass where the cost of repair far exceeded the price of a replacement. Yet, within those numerous cracks, there was a faint, indefinable feeling—like melted, low-temperature wax. It was a suppressed, frantic heat that felt simultaneously icy cold.

Clo lowered her head in contemplation, her thoughts gradually drifting into deeper layers of imagination and reflection. She thought about the recent news and the increasing incidents of violence. The summer heat hadn't receded even after several bouts of heavy rain, and the pleasant coolness of autumn was nowhere to be seen. Clo just wanted the temperature to drop a little.

“Rumble!” A pale bolt of lightning pierced the darkening sky. The lights in the classroom flickered. Clo’s body jolted, and she couldn't help but let out a small gasp of surprise, clearly startled. A moment later, the pitter-patter of rain followed.

The torrential rain fell mercilessly onto the scorching marble ground, seeping into the soil between the cracks. Clo was stunned; in that moment, she felt as if she could smell the rising waves of summer heat.

Hopefully the temperature will drop along with it, Clo thought, exhaling a breath of murky air. The world before her eyes turned white for an instant, followed by the sound of another crack of thunder. She shrank her neck slightly. With rain this heavy, it seemed unrealistic to take an umbrella and catch the subway. It wasn't worth catching a cold just to save a bit of money.

Her family wasn't home recently; they seemed to be abroad for the time being. This sudden storm might be the typhoon mentioned in the news. She wondered how long local flights would be suspended.

She glanced at Li Yue, who was rummaging through her bag. There was no umbrella in it. That was normal; she was usually picked up by a family driver. On a rainy day like this, he would likely bring an umbrella inside to find her. As for the trope of sharing an umbrella like in manga or anime... Clo gave a self-deprecating smile, the sound of which was perfectly masked by the thunder.

So... what was she looking for?

Clo checked the taxi fare on her phone, her hand pausing slightly.

“I forgot my phone... Tsk, forget it. I’ll just wait until school is officially over...” Li Yue frowned.

Li Yue pursed her lips, her expression remaining calm. The room was quiet. Clo was looking for earplugs in her bag, intending to take a short nap, but after a clap of thunder, she heard cheering from the hallway. She froze for a moment, and as she turned her head, she happened to catch the stiff expression on Li Yue’s face.

Minutes later, Clo stood at the school gate holding an umbrella with Li Yue. It seemed school had been dismissed early to prepare for the approaching typhoon...

“What did your driver say?” Clo asked with a helpless look, glancing at the somewhat frozen Li Yue.

“Uncle Chen is busy with company matters. He doesn't seem to be able to get away right now...”

“I thought he was a professional driver.” Clo recalled her impression of a man with dark red hair.

“My father is still abroad, and Uncle Chen is acting as his proxy for the company's business. Uncle Chen has no family of his own, so he treats me as his own daughter.” Li Yue paused before the words about him having no family; clearly, there were complicated circumstances she didn't care to explain.

“Then let me call a car for you—”

“I didn't bring my keys either. There are no other servants at home; my father hates outsiders.”

Looking at Li Yue’s dazed and somewhat lonely expression, Clo felt her heart rate quicken slightly.

“Then just come home with me.” The words practically tumbled out of Clo’s mouth. She pursed her lips, feeling as if a cliché but not unwelcome plot point was about to descend upon her.

She looked into Li Yue’s eyes, expecting to see a formulaic mix of resistance, refusal, shyness, or gratitude.

But it wasn't quite as she imagined. After a brief moment of awkwardness, Li Yue simply nodded gently. Clo cautiously stole a glance at her blood-colored eyes, which still held those same emotions.

Confusion, brokenness, hysteria... and... fanaticism.

She couldn't help but shudder.

This autumn chill was arriving earlier than she had expected...