You've Got to Be Kidding Me

Lu Yan still came back very late. He had eaten with Fu Feng at the Molten Heart Tower, and the taste... well, it could only be described as unspeakable. It instantly gave Lu Yan flashbacks to his high school cafeteria.

To offer so many different varieties and flavors, yet manage to make every single dish taste equally terrible, was truly a remarkable skill.

Swallowing the food in his mouth, Lu Yan marveled from the bottom of his heart that this chef was truly a genius in his own right.

Across from him, Fu Feng was also clearly battling the food on his tray, chewing with a deep frown.

He grabbed the water pitcher next to him and poured it down his throat, washing down the half-chewed mass that he couldn't bring himself to swallow with a gulp of warm water.

“Brother,” Fu Feng said with a pained expression, “what is wrong with you? Why on earth did you insist on eating at the cafeteria?”

Of course he knew the cafeteria food was awful. Only low-level cultivators who hadn't achieved Inedia yet would come here to eat.

As for high-level cultivators who wanted to indulge their appetite, they wouldn't dream of eating here. They would choose upscale restaurants outside; otherwise, Huamanlou would have gone out of business long ago.

Lu Yan was suffering too. Even the basic meals at Huamanlou tasted better than the Molten Heart Tower's cafeteria. But there was nothing he could do. Who was to blame when he had a guilty conscience... or rather, someone on his mind?

As for eating out, Lu Yan felt that compared to an empty wallet, subjecting his taste buds to a little suffering was acceptable. However, it was hard on Fu Feng.

This young master, in order to appease his father and preserve his hard-won forging privileges, had to come up and fuss over Lu Yan whenever Lu Yan was at the Molten Heart Tower.

Whenever he had free time, he would seek out Lu Yan for a chat. Over time, Lu Yan had indirectly become one of his few acquaintances in the Molten Heart Tower.

Of course, even with acquaintances, Lu Yan still wore his mask out of habit. To him, going without a mask felt like being naked; it had already become a part of his very being.

Fu Feng stared at the remaining half-bowl of food on his tray with deep-seated hatred. It wasn't that he hadn't offered to take Lu Yan out. Even if he paid, eating outside would be infinitely better than eating garbage here.

Lu Yan had already finished his food. To be honest, he really wanted to meet the chef here. Their culinary skills were on par with each other, making them kindred spirits in the art of terrible cooking.

Standing up, he waved goodbye to Fu Feng and turned back toward the classroom. Seeing him leave, Fu Feng quickly threw his food, tray and all, into the trash bin.

He rinsed his mouth and called over the cafeteria manager. “Dammit! If you don't get a new chef by tomorrow, close this fucking cafeteria down!”

Sweating profusely, the manager offered a placating smile. “Young Sect Master, the chef and the purchasing agent are both the nephews of the Sect Master's third concubine. You see... it's a bit difficult.”

“I don't care if they're his nephews or his brothers-in-law! If they keep cooking this garbage, I'm going to starve to death!” Fu Feng was exceptionally irritable. Naturally, no one would be in a good mood after being forced to eat food that tasted like sewage.

“If they can't do the job, fire them! Having them pack their bags will only put my father in a bad mood for a couple of days. But if I have to eat this trash again, see if I let you keep your job!”

This blatant threat slapped the manager right in the face. Adopting the mindset of "better you than me," the manager resolutely declared his absolute loyalty to the Young Sect Master.

Though he wore a smile on his face, he gritted his teeth in his heart. Damn it, as soon as I step into that kitchen, I'm going to beat whoever I see.

While Fu Feng was still passionately arguing with the squirming cafeteria manager, Lu Yan had already slipped out of the Molten Heart Tower.

He didn't have any classes in the afternoon. What would he even do if he stayed there? Revise lesson plans? Prepare for classes? Was he really that bored?

Given the learning pace of these students, the book he had compiled at the start was enough to keep these greenhorns busy for at least two months. Prepare lessons? For the sake of the future? He wasn't Zhang Beihai.

He sighed. He truly had nothing to do. As for cultivation... at his current rate of self-cultivation, he probably wouldn't even reach the Golden Core stage in this lifetime.

The shattered state of his spiritual sea had a massive impact on him. Even though it was much better than before, trying to move even a single fragment still took at least half a year.

Fortunately, that previous deus ex machina had given him a much-needed recovery boost. Otherwise, he would still be relying on voices just to orient his gaze toward people's faces.

With another sigh, he realized it all came down to a lack of money. If he were wealthy, he could buy a hundred sets of materials for Focus-Stabilizing Pills, even if his success rate was only one percent.

He scratched his head in frustration. Even with the success rate he'd had during his Qi Condensation stage, three sets of materials should have been more than enough to refine a single batch, let alone now when he was in the Foundation Establishment stage. If he hadn't been so distracted, there was no way all three attempts would have ended in explosions.

Sigh... what should I do? Lu Yan watched the setting sun, so worried his hair was almost turning white. Wait, if it turns white, would that count as a matching couple's hair color with Jiang Ci?

Lu Yan slapped himself across the face, expressionless. Can you fucking pull yourself together?

But clearly, even if he could control his lower house, he couldn't control his upper house. With both defenses completely breached, what was he supposed to do? He was in utter despair.

Now he literally had a home he couldn't return to. What kind of mess was this? He couldn't just loiter around the Molten Heart Tower forever either.

That would make him look like an annoying overachiever to the regular employees, the exact kind of person who would get isolated in a corporate office.

Although Lu Yan had little interest in superficial socializing, as an extrovert at heart, he still had no desire to experience being an isolated and despised outcast.

He closed his eyes. Cultivate, start cultivating! But the moment he shut them, all sorts of random thoughts flooded his mind, making it impossible to focus.

In the end, he could only wander aimlessly through the streets and alleys of Everspring City.

He was like a drifting ghost, or perhaps a laid-off husband who didn't dare tell his wife and could only loiter outside.

Only when the sun was dragged down by the night, swallowed, and instantly refined, did he finally dare to return to Huamanlou. The darkness slowly crept across the horizon, and the moon took the stage, casting its pure, bright light.

Although he had stayed out for quite a while, he had actually returned relatively early today. Hua Er, Hong Jiu, Yao Wu, and Chen San were gathered around a small table, eating dinner.

Nannan was sitting on Yao Wu's lap. Yao Wu would take a bite, and then Nannan would take a bite. In truth, Nannan was quite well-behaved and not particularly clingy; it was entirely because some sort of doting servant instinct had awakened in Yao Wu, insisting that she sit on his lap to eat.

Seeing Lu Yan arrive, Hua Er immediately asked, “Have you eaten?” Smelling the delicious aroma of the food on the table, Lu Yan's mouth watered in spite of himself.

But why on earth was the food at the Molten Heart Tower so ridiculously filling? If they hadn't slipped some sort of satiety agent in there, he would do a handstand and wash his hair right then and there.

Having eaten just one bowl of rice at noon, he still felt like it was stuck in his throat.

He could only gaze longingly at the wonderful dishes, nod at Hua Er, and tell her that he had already eaten.

Thinking that it was indeed too late for him not to have eaten, Hua Er didn't press further. But as she watched Lu Yan turn to head upstairs, she hesitated for a moment before speaking up.

“I don't know what's gotten into Jiangjiang, but she suddenly asked me for alcohol. You didn't bully her, did you?”

Lu Yan was utterly taken aback. “Jiang Ci asked for alcohol? And what do you mean, bully her? How could I have bullied her?”

Hua Er let out a sigh of relief. As long as he hadn't bullied her, it was fine. After a brief internal struggle, she said, “You... go check on her. She might be in a bad mood lately, so comfort her a bit.”

With that, Hua Er picked up her empty bowl and left, leaving Lu Yan standing there in a daze.

Internally, Hua Er was weeping. She had just pushed her own crush into the arms of another! Sob, sob. She wasn't stupid; even if those two weren't cultivation companions yet, it was only a matter of time.

It was just that she had finally met someone she liked so much. Sob. All she could do now was wish them happiness. She understood the principles of not taking what belonged to others and respecting a brother's wife; she would never be a third wheel.

Lu Yan rubbed his nose, noticing Yao Wu winking and gesturing at him. He mouthed a silent curse back at him before slowly heading upstairs.

His room was further down the corridor, and he had to pass Jiang Ci's room to get there. Originally, Jiang Ci's room had been the innermost one.

However, once Hong Jiu found out that Hua Er had given up her own room for Jiang Ci and squeezed into hers instead, she had quickly tidied up another room for Jiang Ci.

By the dim light, he noticed that Jiang Ci's door was slightly ajar. It was impossible for him to go in, and she was probably already asleep at this hour anyway. Did drinking alcohol make her guard drop this low?

He gently pulled Jiang Ci's door shut, making sure to do it as quietly as possible so as not to disturb whoever was sleeping inside.

Excellent. Satisfied, Lu Yan continued toward his own room. Seeing his own door standing open, he wondered if he had forgotten to close it this morning.

Or maybe the broken lock had let the wind blow it open?

Lu Yan didn't think too much of it. He pushed the door open and stepped inside. Leaving early and returning late every day was exhausting.

He didn't bother lighting a lamp, collapsing straight onto the bed and pulling the blanket over himself.

Suddenly, the scent of alcohol mixed with a sweet fragrance rushed into his nose. His face went pale, but in the next instant, he was pulled into a tight, warm embrace.

Right by his ear, a soft, sleepy voice whispered like a dream,

“Mm, you're back.”