Li Nanzhu's heart skipped a beat, nearly leaping out of her throat.
She could smell the pleasant scent of sandalwood emanating from the older woman and see the perfectly groomed hair and calm eyes of the older man.
"Hello there," the older man spoke first, his voice deep and gentle, like autumn afternoon sunlight, devoid of any pressure. "Could you tell me what your names are?"
"I—I'm Li Nanzhu! I'm... five years old!" Li Nanzhu answered almost by reflex. Her voice was taut with tension, carrying a faint, nearly imperceptible stutter as she forced her back straight.
"I—I'm Xiao Ya! I'm five, too! Nanzhu and I are best friends!" Xiao Ya’s voice was crisper than hers. Although she was also nervous, she seemed more fluent. She gave their joined hands a firm shake, squeezing out a sweet smile as if to emphasize their closeness.
The older woman smiled slightly, her gaze lingering for a moment on their intertwined hands. It was a kind smile, yet for some reason, Li Nanzhu felt it was... distant.
The woman crouched down so her eyes were level with the two children, a gesture that seemed exceptionally considerate.
"Xiao Zhu, Xiao Ya, those are both lovely names," the older woman said softly. Her gaze scanned Li Nanzhu's face carefully before moving to Xiao Ya. "Do you... want to leave this place and go to a new family?"
"Yes!" the two replied in unison, answering without a hint of hesitation, their eyes filled with the same burning expectation.
A benevolent smile appeared on the woman's face as her gaze swept over the two small, immature faces written with longing. Then, she spoke softly, her voice tender: "Then I want to ask you a question. If... if this uncle and I wanted to take one child home, which one would you hope it would be? Or rather, why do you want to go with us?"
The question was gentle, even encouraging.
But Li Nanzhu's heart sank.
She opened her mouth, countless thoughts flashing through her mind in an instant: she wanted to leave this place, she wanted clean and warm blankets, she wanted to eat delicious food, she wanted to stop having to watch people's expressions, she wanted... she wanted a place that truly belonged to her, where she wouldn't have to worry about being abandoned or forgotten...
However, as these words rushed to her lips, they seemed to be blocked by something.
She looked into the woman's gentle eyes that seemed able to see through everything, then at Xiao Ya's nervous and expectant expression. A strange, indescribable sense of stagnation caught in her throat.
What should she say? What could she say to make this refined-looking couple choose her?
"I... I want to..." she murmured, her small face flushing red with urgency and an inability to express herself. "I want to... be able to eat my fill, not be cold... to have—have a place to live..." These words sounded dry, perhaps even... opportunistic?
Even she felt something was wrong; it was as if there was a layer between these words and the deeper longing in her heart.
The woman continued to smile, nodding as she turned her gaze toward Xiao Ya.
Xiao Ya took a breath, her eyes bright as she looked at the woman. Though her voice still held a childish tone, she was much more fluent than Li Nanzhu, carrying an innocent, almost instinctive desire: "Auntie, Uncle, I... I want a home. I want to have a father and a mother. I'll be very good and obedient. I'll love my father and mother very much, help mother with the chores, and listen to father. I... I want to become a family with you."
Her answer was simple and direct, even possessing the clumsy honesty of a child, yet it struck right at the core of the warmth and emotional bonds of a 'home.'
It wasn't a need for survival, but a craving for 'love' and 'belonging.'
The older couple exchanged a glance, both seeing a trace of gentle emotion in the other's eyes.
Such an answer, coming from the mouth of a five-year-old orphan, was pure and sincere. It was far more moving than requests regarding food and warmth.
The older woman reached out, gently patting Xiao Ya's head, and said softly, "What a sensible, good child."
Li Nanzhu's heart chilled bit by bit.
She saw the approval in the woman's eyes for Xiao Ya, saw Xiao Ya's eyes light up instantly from the praise, and saw the contrast created by her own lackluster answer.
She knew she had lost.
It wasn't that she didn't long for it enough, but rather... she didn't seem to know how to express it. Or perhaps the longing deep in her heart was too complex, mixed with a heavy awareness of 'survival' that a child of her age shouldn't have, making her unable to purely crave 'love' and 'home' like Xiao Ya.
The woman looked back at Li Nanzhu, seemingly wanting to give her one more chance, and asked gently, "What about Xiao Zhu? Besides being fed and warm, do you have any other thoughts?"
Li Nanzhu bit her lip hard.
Her mind was a mess. She looked at the woman's waiting gaze. She had to say something! Anything!
In extreme tension and confusion, a sentence that was completely unthought-of, almost instinctive, blurted out:
"I... I want to live well!"
As the words fell, the courtyard fell silent for a moment.
The older couple was clearly taken aback, the gentle expressions on their faces showing a slight freeze.
Even Xiao Ya, whose eyes had been shining with expectation, blinked in confusion, not quite understanding the answer.
"Live... well?" the man repeated, his tone carrying a faint, indiscernible oddness. "Can you not live well here?"
Li Nanzhu shook her head violently. The color drained from her small face, but her eyes stubbornly met Uncle Chen's gaze. "It's not the same... Here, it's just... existing. Going with you is... living well."
She spoke haltingly, her logic even somewhat muddled, but that almost instinctive distinction and obsession with the 'quality of survival' was clearly conveyed.
For a five-year-old raised in an orphanage, this answer was too 'deep,' inappropriately so, perhaps even... a bit eerie.
It lacked the innocent radiance a child should have and the direct longing for family. Instead, it exuded an overly mature, calm, even cold evaluation of 'survival' itself.
It didn't sound like a child's yearning for a 'home,' but more like a declaration against some potential threat or suffering, carrying a stubborn will to survive that was inconsistent with her age.
In comparison, Xiao Ya's emotionally charged "I want a home" and "I'll love my father and mother" was much more like the kind of answer a normal child would give—one that made people's hearts soften and feel at ease.
The couple exchanged a look. In that glance was evaluation, consideration, and also a hint of an indescribable... distance.
What they wanted was a child who could blend into a new family and bring warmth and emotional rewards, not a small adult whose thoughts were too heavy, who seemed to view 'being adopted' more as a 'survival strategy,' and who was somewhat difficult to read.
"You are both good children," the woman finally said with a smile, giving a non-committal evaluation. She gently patted Xiao Ya's shoulder again, the time her gaze lingered on her significantly longer and much softer than it had been on Li Nanzhu.
Though she didn't announce it immediately, that subtle body language and the leaning of her gaze were enough to explain the matter.
Xiao Ya seemed to sense something as well. She turned to look at Li Nanzhu, the original tension and expectation in her eyes gradually replaced by a mixture of guilt, relief, and a hint of bewildered helplessness.
She held Li Nanzhu's hand, but her grip loosened, becoming somewhat superficial.
"Xiao Zhu, you're still young. Living well is something everyone must do," the woman's tone remained gentle, but a sense of distance had quietly opened up. "But a home isn't just for the sake of living."
She said no more, her gaze falling back onto Xiao Ya. That benevolent, approving smile returned to her face as she nodded to her husband beside her.
The husband also gave a slight nod, looking toward the director.
A look of 'as expected' appeared on the director's face. Her gaze softened as she looked at Xiao Ya, while she gave Li Nanzhu only a brief, indifferent glance.
"Xiao Ya, come here."
Xiao Ya let out an "Ah!" Her massive surprise almost made her jump. She abruptly let go of Li Nanzhu's hand, which she had been holding tightly, and threw herself toward the older woman like a happy little bird.
The woman smiled and gently gathered her into her arms.
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