Secret

When Gu Xiang Kai saw Nan Yue eating in the dining room the next day, he felt something was off.

She didn't seem as energetic as yesterday, and the coldness and gloom in her expression were more pronounced.

It was as if... she had returned to the state she was in when he first met her.

That cold and murderous look she had when she was on the verge of attacking the shop owner who threatened her...

In short, she was in a very bad mood, looking like she wanted to destroy the world.

Gu Xiang Kai rare softened his voice as he sat down properly across from Nan Yue.

"...Did you not rest well last night?"

Nan Yue lowered her eyes and slowly sipped her porridge. "...It was just so-so."

Indeed, it was just so-so.

Since she could remember, every night had been like this—unable to sleep, fainting from extreme fear and suffocation, then waking up again.

A repeating cycle.

Countless times she felt she would never wake up again, and as she approached twenty, that premonition grew stronger.

That thing... it seemed to want her life.

But after entering the Qualification Exam, she discovered by chance that the thing didn't appear during missions.

She could get a good night's sleep.

So even if her grandmother, who didn't look human, watched her like a hawk from outside, or even if she slept next to dismembered limbs in the apartment, she was happy.

Because she could fall asleep.

She hadn't felt much when she first came out of the Qualification Exam, which was why she was so eager to enter a second one.

After leaving Everpeace Apartments, she had slept well for two nights.

Just when she was hoping against hope that it would continue, that thing returned yesterday.

...She knew it wouldn't be that easy to get rid of.

But one thing was certain: the scavenger purification missions could indeed suppress the thing inside her.

Nan Yue had a theory that the thing was like a parasite, competing with her for the life of this body.

It had been dormant before because she was too small and didn't suit its appetite.

Later, as she grew up and it was about to consume her, she entered a purification mission.

There must be something in the missions, perhaps a magnetic field or some substance, that could suppress it.

As for why it hadn't appeared in the two days since she left the mission, it might be because Nan Yue had grown.

It was undeniable that Nan Yue was growing, progressing, and becoming stronger within the missions.

Therefore, she could suppress it briefly.

But it wasn't enough... far from enough.

Nan Yue had a premonition that if she could keep surviving missions, she would one day find a way to suppress or even kill this thing.

"You seem to be in a very bad mood."

Gu Xiang Kai was as cautious as a fledgling wild dog. Nan Yue rubbed her temples. "How has your rest been?"

"Hmm?"

Gu Xiang Kai glanced at Nan Yue. "We've only been out for five days, and you're already planning to enter a mission again?"

Gu Xiang Kai smiled. "As expected, capable people are always driven."

It didn't matter to him. His life was worth nothing, and it was the same wherever he lived. Unlike Zhu Xi Ning, Gu Xiang Kai wasn't the type to enjoy life after a mission; he found it meaningless.

He just found it interesting. Nan Yue seemed different from him—calm and smart. He thought she would better balance missions and life.

Nan Yue swallowed her porridge, wondering if she was being too aggressive.

For her, entering a mission was for survival, but for others, missions were life-or-death struggles. They would never enter one until the last possible second.

She wasn't alone now; she was a captain and had to be responsible for her teammates.

"No, I was just asking. We'll still enter on the ninth day."

Gu Xiang Kai looked at Nan Yue with some confusion. He always felt like something was weighing on her.

Of course, he wasn't someone curious about other people's privacy. Although teammates should trust each other, he understood that everyone had their secrets.

What he found contradictory was Nan Yue's very open attitude toward him, whether it was the previous Qualification Exam or the sharing of grades and personal points.

She had practically categorized Gu Xiang Kai as one of her own without any hesitation, even sharing the most important points.

Such a person was open and upright. Even if there was something she couldn't say, Nan Yue would probably bluntly say, "It's not time to tell you yet, maybe later."

But Gu Xiang Kai had an intuition that Nan Yue was desperately hiding a secret. This secret wasn't about her past, awakened ability, or thoughts.

It had nothing to do with character, bottom lines, or morals.

It was like... fear.

Yes, it was like fear.

She was unwilling to even mention it or admit it, as if it were a source of contagion that would swallow her the moment she felt the urge to share it.

It was a very strange feeling.

Gu Xiang Kai had lived for many years and had never encountered such a feeling.

Furthermore, Nan Yue's previous performance was too brilliant. What attracted Gu Xiang Kai and even Zhu Xi Ning to her was that sense of indifference.

It wasn't the "I don't care if I die" kind of fearlessness that he had, but a genuine lack of fear.

It was as if she couldn't feel fear, as if she lacked that psychological function.

Could there really be something that could make such a person feel fear?

Gu Xiang Kai ate in silence. He didn't ask further, which made Nan Yue breathe a sigh of relief. She really didn't know how to describe the thing inside her.

Others would surely think she was a monster. By then, she would have to deal with missions, this thing, and people with ill intentions. It would be too much trouble.

Besides, one should never expose their weaknesses to others; she knew this very well.

As expected, Zhu Xi Ning returned on the eighth day. She seemed to have adapted well to this polarized lifestyle and immediately went to greet Nan Yue.

The owner also returned safely, with no difference other than the increased exhaustion on his face.

Tomorrow was the day to enter the mission. Nan Yue was so excited she barely slept all night.

Even the stench of rotting meat in her breath couldn't suppress her anticipation.

If she came back alive this time...

She would surely be able to sleep well for a few more days.

She ran into Zhu Xi Ning when they were setting out. Zhu Xi Ning looked at Nan Yue standing with Gu Xiang Kai, hesitated for a moment, and finally nodded, saying a few words wishing them safety.

The combination of Gu Xiang Kai and Nan Yue drew a lot of attention. Gu Xiang Kai seemed very famous, as people coming to the Inspection Port were frequently looking back at him.

Though their gazes were discreet, they were numerous.

"You really are a celebrity."

Gu Xiang Kai smiled dismissively and rubbed his buzz cut. "In the lower city states, everyone is struggling to survive. Anyone with a bit of skill becomes a celebrity."

Gu Xiang Kai tilted his chin. "Zhu Xi Ning is also a celebrity, not just for her ability, but for her lifestyle."

"She's very popular in missions; many people like to team up with her, but she usually acts alone."

"I've been in a mission with her once."

This was easy to guess. Zhu Xi Ning's awakened ability was practically a life-saving charm; she had to be careful.

"Then that Chi He from last time..."

Gu Xiang Kai's expression twisted as if he had eaten something foul. "That guy isn't ordinary; he's definitely not from the lower city states."