Waking to realize it was but a dream, an unbearable sorrow...
Xu Xian pulled himself away from it all.
The illusions continued, one after another like wind and rain, repeating over and over.
Xu Xian remained indifferent, shattering them one by one.
Until eventually,
He himself forgot how many illusions he had experienced or how many temptations the heart demon had thrown his way.
Saving the world,
Attaining the Dao and becoming an immortal,
A life of hedonistic dreams,
All of it was but drifting clouds.
Ten years,
A hundred years,
A thousand years?
Ten lifetimes,
A hundred lifetimes,
A thousand lifetimes?
Xu Xian could no longer remember.
Quantity breeds quality. In his confusion, there were truly countless moments when Xu Xian almost lost himself within them.
But in the end, it was always just a bit short.
The illusions,
Shattered upon impact.
The world turned into a dull grey. Heaven and earth were stained with ink, composed only of black and white lines.
Standing in the center of the world felt like being inside an ink-wash scroll.
The heart demon hung above his head, manifesting in ten thousand ways.
Xu Xian stood tall in the center, as calm as a still well.
“Take a break.”
“This is boring!”
Xu Xian's voice rang out lazily, filled not with impatience, but only with a sense of being utterly drained of interest.
Space stood still; even the wind froze. In the grey, someone took up a brush and began to sketch. A colorless youth stood straight before Xu Xian.
They stood face to face,
As if looking into a mirror.
To say they were identical would be an understatement; they were perfectly indistinguishable.
The only difference,
Was that Xu Xian's eyes had lost the ability to distinguish color.
“He” was dark-colored.
Lines of ink,
Dull grey eyes.
Xu Xian spoke again, breaking the silence of the place.
“Give up. You cannot defeat me.”
The ink-colored youth curled his lips, looking intrigued.
Xu Xian continued, “Because you were originally me...”
The ink-colored youth did not argue. He agreed, “I concur.”
After a pause, he added, “Therefore, you cannot win against me either.”
Xu Xian narrowed his eyes slightly.
The ink-colored youth stated calmly, “However... I have all the time in the world to wear you down. What about you? Do you have the time?”
Xu Xian shook his head and laughed.
“Heh...”
The ink-colored youth questioned, “What are you laughing at?”
Xu Xian said slowly, “A Yellow Millet Dream seems to last a thousand years, but it is actually just an instant. I may not have much time, but a dream in the mortal world is but a drop in the ocean. If you feel it is necessary, I can keep this up with you forever.”
Before entering meditation, Xu Xian had already understood this.
The Heart Demon Tribulation had begun.
A thought was but an instant.
As long as the original body did not sink into oblivion, the heart demon would eventually exhaust itself.
Xu Xian did not believe that another version of himself could truly trap him in a dream forever.
A lucid dream,
Would eventually have to end.
The ink-colored youth gave a bitter smile. “You are very clever, just like me.”
Xu Xian always felt it was a bit strange.
Praising himself?
Well, let him praise.
It was the truth anyway.
He replied, “You are also very clever.”
The ink-colored youth changed the subject, mocking himself, “But you and I only have petty cleverness, not great wisdom.”
“Oh?”
Xu Xian looked intrigued.
The ink-colored youth continued, “Take you, for instance. To have reached where you are today, you have relied on nothing but luck.”
Trying to dismantle my Dao heart? This is somewhat interesting.
“And so?”
“If I were you, I would stop here. End it all right now,” it said.
Xu Xian was amused. He laughed, “This is exactly why you are the heart demon, my shadow, while I am the host.”
You want to stop here and be content with the status quo, but I do not. My ambitions are high.
The ink-colored youth continued his mockery, “Sharp-tongued and full of sophistry. You and I are originally one. I was not born out of nothing; my thoughts originate from you.”
“I am the rational one. You also know that if we continue, our future will be filled with uncertainty.”
“We will fail miserably,”
“And we will die miserably.”
“Is it not better to look after yourself?”
“Why must you enter the fray alone?”
“You know very well that you and I, Xu Xian, are just ordinary people...”
“You and I, Xu Xian, are not saints...”
“Saving the common people?”
“Listen to yourself. Isn't such a thought hilarious? Isn't it absurd?”
“You are someone who has already died once...”
“......”
It rambled on, words flowing incessantly. It presented a basketful of arguments, weighing pros and cons, mocking and deriding.
Xu Xian listened but remained silent throughout.
It was right.
It was him.
It was his deeply hidden second personality, the combination of all his negative emotions.
The words it spoke and the viewpoints it presented had all played out in Xu Xian's mind before.
Some had flashed by, while others had been carefully considered.
However,
In the end,
Xu Xian had made a different choice.
Now,
It had emerged again at this dead end, trying to subvert him, to make him compromise and sink.
But that would be no easy task.
Xu Xian did not wish to argue with it. He chose silence, quietly watching its performance.
The “Xu Xian” before him knew him well, but did he not also know it?
He knew exactly how to make it break down.
The cold shoulder.
Ignoring it was the best form of attack.
Time passed.
The arguments multiplied.
It said many things.
It said Xu Xian was actually a piece of trash.
It said Li Taibai had used moral blackmail on him.
It said Xu Xian could have lived a very comfortable life.
It even told Xu Xian to live in the moment...
And so on.
Eventually, it broke. it went mad and lunged at Xu Xian to kill him.
The two of them fought a grand battle within the sea of consciousness.
“I gave you good advice and you wouldn't listen. Then don't blame me for taking action to erase you and take over this body...”
Xu Xian narrowed his eyes slightly. “You're getting desperate...”
The same moves.
The same strength.
The two evenly matched opponents fought until the sea of consciousness turned dark and space collapsed...
A true battle of heaven and man was being fought within his mind.
The process was long.
Xu Xian was in pain.
But the result was good.
When a certain opportunity arrived, Xu Xian won, personally crushing the ink-colored Xu Xian in his palm.
It was in pain,
It was distorted,
It roared,
It was stubborn.
Even at its wit's end, it was just like Xu Xian, refusing to compromise or give up.
It continued to clamor and howl.
It looked exactly like the version of himself from four hundred years ago, fearing neither heaven nor earth.
But.
People eventually grow up.
Xu Xian was no longer the Xu Xian of the past.
He looked at it calmly. “You lost.”
It laughed manically, “Yes, you lost...”
Xu Xian corrected it patiently, “No, I won.”
It said crazily, “Yes, I won.”
Xu Xian's brow furrowed.
He cursed it as insane in his heart.
Yet he did not know how to refute it.
Because,
It was always him.
Regardless of victory or defeat,
That could not be changed.
He exerted force suddenly, crushing the heart demon.
After letting out a howl of agony, it transformed into countless black ink lines, scattering with the wind.
The world before him gradually collapsed and crumbled.
It fell apart inch by inch.
Standing within it,
The world inverted black and white.
Until a certain moment,
Xu Xian felt a surge of power flood his entire body, washing away all exhaustion and daze.
Under the influence of this power, he was forcibly pulled out.
He snapped his eyes open.
The underground,
The magma pool,
The half-open Sky Gate...
Everything was as it had been.
Yet by his ear, he could still faintly hear its final cry: “You lost, you finally lost. It's fake, all of it is fake! Hahaha...”
Xu Xian was in a daze, his head throbbing with pain, a flash of agony appearing in his eyes.
“Master,”
“Master,”
“Master...”
Xu Xian suppressed his agitation and looked toward the source of the sound. The Little Book Spirit was hovering in mid-air.
With lingering fear, it said, “That’s wonderful, you’ve finally woken up. I thought you were never going to wake up again...”
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