When Lu Xueqing came out of the house, she was holding two tecups in her hands.
At that moment, she stood in the shadows inside, making no sound.
Neither of the two people fighting fiercely in the courtyard noticed her; one was focused on attacking, the other on defending. Neither spared a glance toward the house.
Bai Qingxue didn’t know Lu Xueqing had come out, and Ye Qingyao knew even less that a third person was present in the courtyard.
And so Lu Xueqing stood there, watching the two of them.
Steam still rose from the tea in the cups, which Lu Xueqing had just freshly brewed.
Originally, she had planned to wait for Bai Qingxue to finish practicing her sword, and then they would sit together under the old plum tree to have a cup. This had become a tacit understanding between her and Junior Sister Bai.
Today was no different.
Lu Xueqing had been waiting in the house for a while. The tea was brewed, the water had boiled; she was only waiting for the person.
Then the courtyard gate had been knocked upon.
Lu Xueqing stood by the window. Through the half-closed shutters, she saw Ye Qingyao enter the courtyard.
Lu Xueqing was stunned for a moment. It wasn’t that she didn’t know Ye Qingyao, but they hadn’t met in a long time.
Long enough that she had almost forgotten such a person existed, long enough that she had almost started to think she was the only one by Bai Qingxue’s side.
Lu Xueqing suddenly remembered that Ye Qingyao and Bai Qingxue were old acquaintances from Yunzhou, and it seemed they had known each other much longer than she, the senior sister, had.
Lu Xueqing had almost forgotten one thing.
Junior Sister Bai was never a treasure that only she had discovered. Long before her, someone had already been coveting her.
Lu Xueqing didn’t go out. She didn’t know why she didn’t.
She simply stood by the window for a while, watching Ye Qingyao enter the courtyard, watching Bai Qingxue sheath her sword, and watching the two of them stand still ten feet apart.
She thought Ye Qingyao would just say a few words and leave, like before—cautiously handing over something and then departing.
She still held the tea tray. Once Ye Qingyao left, she could walk out and hand the tea to Bai Qingxue, just like usual.
But things went beyond her expectations. Somehow, Ye Qingyao began practicing the sword with Junior Sister Bai.
Ye Qingyao’s sword was fast, much faster than an ordinary disciple’s.
But Lu Xueqing wasn’t looking at the sword; she was looking at Ye Qingyao’s eyes.
Those eyes were constantly fixed on Junior Sister Bai. Every time the two drew close, Ye Qingyao’s gaze was locked on Junior Sister Bai’s face, as if afraid of missing something, or perhaps wanting to hold onto this moment for just a heartbeat longer.
Lu Xueqing was all too familiar with that look. She looked at Junior Sister Bai the same way every day.
She had thought that look belonged to her alone, but in reality, it didn’t. It never had.
In Lu Xueqing’s sight, the distance between the two was shortening.
With every strike Ye Qingyao made, she got a little closer.
First an arm’s length, then half an arm, then just a turn’s distance. Occasionally, their robes overlapped. Between the rising and falling of sword light, frost-white and pale green tangled together, then separated.
Not long after separating, they tangled together again.
The hand Lu Xueqing used to hold the tea tray remained perfectly still, but her fingers lightly rubbed the rim of the cup, once, then again.
Ye Qingyao used to look at Bai Qingxue too, but back then, she stood outside the crowd, far away.
Now it was different. She stood opposite Bai Qingxue, close enough that she might even smell the scent on Junior Sister Bai’s robes.
Lu Xueqing didn’t know if Ye Qingyao smelled it, but she certainly did.
Even from this far away, she smelled it...
Ye Qingyao’s sword was knocked aside, her hand trembling, yet she relentlessly pursued again.
Lu Xueqing watched her be blocked back time and again, only to press forward once more.
Ye Qingyao didn’t call for a stop, didn’t admit defeat; she simply held her sword and drew closer.
Lu Xueqing didn’t like this feeling. It wasn’t that she disliked Ye Qingyao; she disliked herself for standing here watching.
Clearly, she was the first person to hug Bai Qingxue. On the day of the finals, when Bai Qingxue sheathed her sword and walked off the stage, she had met her, opened her arms, and hugged her. Junior Sister Bai must have been hugged like that for the first time.
Clearly, she was the first person to receive a gift from Bai Qingxue. That Jade Radiance Pendant—Bai Qingxue had untied it herself, replaced it with a new tassel, put it in a wooden box, and said, “For Senior Sister.” Junior Sister Bai surely had never given anything to anyone else.
These two events were like two pillars supporting Lu Xueqing’s sense of entitlement.
But Ye Qingyao also possessed things she didn’t know about. Those old times Ye Qingyao shared with Junior Sister Bai were something she never had.
Suddenly, Lu Xueqing realized with a hint of panic that she knew nothing of Junior Sister Bai’s past.
Did the Junior Sister Bai of the past smile? Did she speak the same way? Was she as cold then as she was now?
Lu Xueqing wanted to know, yet she didn’t know where to begin looking.
The two in the courtyard were still fighting. Ye Qingyao’s sword drew another inch closer.
Lu Xueqing looked down at the teacup in her hand; it was prepared for Bai Qingxue.
By now, the tea was nearly cold, but Lu Xueqing didn’t put it down, nor did she walk out.
She didn’t know why she still hadn’t walked out. She could have said, “The tea is ready, come drink,” and naturally walked to sit under the old plum tree as usual, waiting for Junior Sister Bai to sheath her sword and come over.
She knew Junior Sister Bai wouldn’t refuse.
Just as when Ye Qingyao came, Junior Sister Bai accepted her sword.
If she brewed tea, Junior Sister Bai would drink her tea.
Junior Sister Bai didn’t care about these things.
But she cared.
She cared that Bai Qingxue took half a step back when accepting Ye Qingyao’s sword, and she cared that that half-step made Ye Qingyao feel she could get even closer.
She cared that the distance between them was shortening inch by inch, and she cared about that look in Ye Qingyao’s eyes—a look she knew too well, something that didn’t belong to her.
Ye Qingyao sheathed her sword.
Bai Qingxue also sheathed her sword.
“Sister Bai, are you watching?”
“I am.”
Lu Xueqing remained in the shadows.
It wasn’t until Ye Qingyao left and the courtyard fell silent that Lu Xueqing finally stepped out.
In truth, Lu Xueqing didn’t know why she was stepping out. She could have just waited for Junior Sister Bai inside.
Perhaps it was because the tea was truly about to get cold, or perhaps because she didn’t want Bai Qingxue to forget her presence in the courtyard.
Lu Xueqing carried the teacups to the veranda. Bai Qingxue took one and took a sip.
“She came specifically for you to see.”
Lu Xueqing hadn’t wanted to say that. She didn’t want Bai Qingxue to know she was watching, didn’t want her to know she had been watching the whole time.
But she said it anyway, and immediately regretted it. After saying it, her heart felt astringent, like a mouthful of tea that had gone completely cold.
Bai Qingxue turned to look at her, but still only gave a faint, “Mm.”
Lu Xueqing said nothing more.
She lowered her head and looked at the jade pendant at her waist. The green tassel hung down, swaying gently in the wind. This jade pendant hung at her waist, not anyone else’s.
She was the first to hug Bai Qingxue, and the first to receive a gift from her.
She was Junior Sister Bai’s senior sister.
These identities were things Ye Qingyao didn’t have.
Lu Xueqing suddenly felt she was being despicable. Clearly, what she wanted had never been just to be “Senior Sister,” yet at this moment, she used that very identity to reassure herself.
She had the right to stand here, the right to say that cup of tea was brewed for Bai Qingxue, the right to stay by Bai Qingxue’s side a little longer.
But what if she weren’t the senior sister? She didn’t dare think about it.
Lu Xueqing swallowed the last sip of cold tea.
It was astringent.
She looked down at the jade pendant at her waist, her fingertip lightly pressing against its edge.
Then Lu Xueqing picked up the tray, turned, and walked back into the house.
Behind her, the leaves of the old plum tree rustled in the wind.
And at that moment, Lu Xueqing thought to herself:
Ah, I forgot to wait for Junior Sister Bai to finish drinking...
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